100wc W33 – Liam

People were outside playing on the green close to my house. They were just talking. My brother Pawn was crying because he did not want to go to sleep. He cried and cried. Then he started wailing. Then he started shouting and then he started screaming. His deafening screams echoed through the cold night. Even the people outside started looking at our house. He just would not stop crying. It was very annoying. It took me hours (although it felt like days) to get back asleep.

And when I was just falling asleep my mam came to wake up for school.

2 thoughts on “100wc W33 – Liam

  1. Haigh Liam,
    Well done, by the time I was finished reading your 100WC I think I could hear the brother in this story. Great use of synonyms for crying, wailing, screaming, shouting, this was very effective as it really emphasized the annoyance and levels of noise the writer was feeling and passed it on to the reader and in the midst of all this you seamlessly included the prompt, well done again.
    I loved your ending, maybe your character will find school a little more relaxing.
    Great 100WC Liam of capturing a moment in time all be a very annoying one! Keep up the writing.

  2. Well done Liam, you made the story very easy to visualise. You used so many adjectives to describe the noises that little people make.

    Understandably you found the crying annoying and then your mum called you for school just as you were falling asleep, I hope your day got better!

    Good job!

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