The big Win
Deafening screams echoed through the cold night. I was in my room playing my Nintendo Switch game with my friends and I heard screams from inside my house. I ran down stairs and my whole family were in the kitchen jumping up and down screaming – ‘we won the lotto’ they screamed ‘At this time of night?’ I said. When I asked how much they screamed again 10 million Euro!!!!! ‘oh my god we’re rich€€€€’ I screamed. Rich! Rich!!! Rich! ‘No more work no more school’ mam said. ‘I was messing about the school bit you still have to go to school’ said mam. ‘Why? We’re rich’ I said. ‘Still – you have to be smart’ said mam.
Haigh Finn,
Great use of the prompt, I was expecting it to be used in a scary story, it was clever and different slant on it.
The short bursts of dialogue in the middle of the story portrayed the excitement felt in the house as your characters couldn’t string a full sentence together. Well done on that.
I also really enjoyed the exchange between the mum and the son/daughter about school, it was a lovely touch of humor in your story.
Great job Finn.
Job well done! You cleverly used the prompt to tell this happy story. The theme of family is universal and therefore relatable to all readers. The sense of excitement and joy comes across in all parts of this story. The comical finishing lines was a brilliant way to wrap up this wonderful storyline.